Spoken Taboo

The thoughts, words, and actions that are natural to me but taboo to others.

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nejma.
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Touch

Bet a bit of me is broken

And I’m fighting to be open

if the possibility of healing is

to be gained.

And I reach out for a token

of affection, words are spoken

that make known the aching

tenderness of my pain.

The only thing that seems to heal is to be held.

Conversation only carries me a spell.

Touch takes the trouble of my tender

Calls upon me to surrender

Arches me into its splendor

Oh so well.

The only thing that seems to heal is to be held.

Conversation only carries me a spell.

Touch teaches me to retrieve

The breath it takes for me to grieve

Reminds me of the road to reprieve

My heart from hell.

by: Candice Nicole

Read more of her work at http://sexandthesisters.wordpress.com/

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February 10 – Pray for the Power To Love
(1 Peter 4: 8)
Sometimes because of disappointments, delays, and just the mundane things in life that get us down, we have lost the authentic, pure, and big love that God gave us from the womb. When we were born, our pure love oozed out of us as children. God expects that pure love to remain with us for life. Many adults have become so hard-hearted that real love seems impossible for them now. Lack of trust, fear, anguish, and hope deferred has made their hearts sick. Sick hearts keeps true love caged. This is not God’s plan for the life of the believer. God expects his children to love so much, so hard, and so strong, that all people would see if your love, even if they don’t know you. If you’ve grown cold, callous, and distance, today is the day for God to renew His love in you so that you become a fresh person again.
Prayer Focus: Spend time in prayer adoring God for His love. Pray that as you move forward, that you will cultivate such a loving relationship with God that His love permeates and oozes out of your heart – which will impact your emotions, body language, choices, and reactions. Ask God to send you people to show you how to love (again, if necessary). Ask God to teach you how to have a heart that even gets His attention.

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Choosing Love

I’m wise enough to know that although I desire marriage, I choose love.

I’ve worn two engagement rings in the past ten years, so I could have had a husband a long time ago, or even recently, had I prioritized marriage over love. But I decided that I would like marriage to be a lifetime love, and not feeling as if love constituted the entire makeup of those relationships, I opted out. There was care, for sure. There was affection, true. But the commitment to be honest, open, and dedicated to the spiritual and personal growth of the other was lacking in both.

I am going to continue choosing love, and right now that love will be focused inward. I don’t know when that will change, and I’m not closed to chance encounters with interested gentlemen, but I think I’m single for this season, for a reason. I trust that I can/will have love in the context of a marriage when the time is right, if that is God’s will for me. That isn’t what this present moment offers me. It offers me another opportunity to give 100% of my attention to myself, and even in the discomfort of that, I welcome the growth that will come from it.

Sometimes I feel bored. Sometimes I feel lonely. Sometimes I feel sad. Sometimes I feel angry. Sometimes I feel restless. Sometimes I feel confused. These are feelings I have been avoiding like the plague in my adult life, and to confront them is not easy for me. But I need it.

Sometimes I feel content. Sometimes I feel at peace. Sometimes I feel joy. I welcome these feelings every time they show up, and I look forward to the moment when they are more pervasive and long-lasting. As for now, I am where I am. It is what it is. And what it is, is love.

- Candice Nicole

Read more at sexandthesisters.wordpress.com